Well, Chip fancies himself to be a religious studies major, but hasn't the first clue about Judaism. Even if his wife is Jewish. I know enough to teach him a few things, here and there. He's taken a liking to using Yiddish whenever he remembers. Keppie (head) is his favorite, as he always says, "let me give keppie a kiss goodnight."
Apparently, I'm 6 years old.
Anyway, in lieu of trying to hold on to some sort of Jewish tradition--especially since I don't attend high holiday services, and don't even ask me when they actually happen--I figured I could at least do a bunch of cooking, invite a few Jewish friends (or hungry ones) over and we could have a little quickie Seder. So, I'm trying to figure out the best and easiest way to do this without killing myself, or making my friends sit through four hours of leaning back. Ultimately, this may not be the most educational experience for the Philosopher. The Princess has decided to keep it as simple as possible. As I told my mother via email (when I was asking the best way to do this as easy as possible) that I want to summarize it to the point of this:
Damn, it sucks being a slave.
Let us go.
Sure thing.
You lied, let us go!
Fuck no.
Fine, have a few gnarly plagues.
Gross, bugs, boils and frogs... and I can't see anything, it's all dark.
Now I've I got blood on my door.
Some weird misty thing just went by.
Oh no, my kid is dead.
Hey guys, we gotta run!
We're stuck! They're closing in!
Fuck, the river parted in half!
Awesome, we just wiped out those Egyptians
I'm lost in a desert for 40 years. Where's the map?
Mana from the sky? Nom nom nom
Oh snap, we're in Israel.
No, Moses you can't come in.
The end!
I'll let you know how it all goes.
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